San Diego Burns

A sense of duty drives me to write about the feelings I have as the firestorms wipe out everything in their paths. San Diego is on fire. This is different. I was here in 2003 for the last firestorm. This is so much bigger, so dark, so powerful, so surreal. The skies are dark even in the daylight hours. Fires spred in multiple directions as opposing winds fight each other for directional control. Embers the size of quarters are thrust forward with the gusts of an angry mythological god's breath. What's all the huffing and puffing about? Fires burn in every corner of the county of San Diego, from Mexico at the south, into Riverside County at the north. It is a very vulnerable feeling to be between the fires that approach the Pacific Ocean. This makes earthquakes look like cake walks. Fire. Who among us does not respect the force, the potential, the gift and curse of fire?
Now small squeekings are asking how the fires started, why they are so out of hand, when will it end, what will be the damages? Some speculate arson. I pray that is not the source of such mass destruction. The firefighters have been working non-stop for more than four days and nights now. Many have been injured; there have been deaths. If it turns out to be arson, pity the poor sucker when found. Help has arrived. It shows in the way people are more relaxed tonight. The end is in sight. The end is eally the beginning where folks who have lost everything, will start over again. The strength of spirit in San Diego is apparent as a few return to the smoldering ruins, the places of their homes. A new fresh start.

Rather, Let's Practice Random Acts of KINDNESS

20 year old, Kayla Fanaei, sitting in her car in Burmingham, Alabama is shot as she talks with a friend on her cell phone. She was a victim of an apparently random, obviously senseless act of violence. With all the talk of the Law of Attraction, it is difficult to reconcile such horror, such pain for her loved-ones. Why would anyone attract this? Kayla was beautiful, inside and out, but she was much more than that. She was an honor student with hopes of being a psychologist, that she could help others. Kayla Fanaei did not wish to 'attract' such an untimely death. She did not intend to leave behind her grieving family and friends. She was, undoubtedly, at the wrong place at the wrong time. As for the Law of Attraction, it must be a tremendous gift of love that is left in the place of such a lovely person. The reason for such a premature death, must be love. Love is what remains when the pain and grief subside. Love is the purpose of Kayla Fanaei's life. And it (that love) is only magnified by her absence. Love is immortal. Immortality is the love we leave in other's hearts when we are gone.
Sending warm blessings and prayers for your hearts to heal tenderly.

What Happened To "It's The Thought That Counts"?

Oprah received a nice 'thank-you' gift from Jerry Seinfeld's wife this week. Oprah had Jerry's wife on to promote her new cook book so as a "thanks" for the promotion Oprah was given 21 pairs of Christian Louboutin ($18000.00 worth) shoes. (tvcocktail.ivillage.com/entertainment/2007/10/jessica_seinfeld_gives_oprah_b.html )
Nice. Because I am relatively certain Oprah needs more shoes.
And all I sent her was an angel....
Who said, "It's the thought that counts."?

Suicide Awareness Promotion

I have been dreadful about posting lately. It's not that there was nothing to blog about. On the contrary, there have been several news stories of late that mention "suicide" even if only for a fleeting moment. In fact, each day this week has presented an opportunity to blog with the news stories. Suicides in the Military are finally being acknowledged. This tells me there is a serious problem with suicides in the lives (and deaths) of US troops. When the government comes out with a little dripping of information, there is surely a flood behind the veil. Troops are exposed to horrific circumstances; they are worlds away from loved-ones, and lets face it, lack of a close support base can lead to suicide among even the toughest sorts. So say a little thank you today. Express gratitude for the life you live. No matter how you feel about war, please take a moment to send out a little positive energy beam into the universal flow. Send some love and light. It's good for the soul. It's good for the WHOLE.
On another horrific note, I learned a new statistic this week. My apologies for saying this, but it MUST be shared. "Suicide is the number 5 cause of death in children ages FIVE (5) years old to ages FOURTEEN (14). " WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE? How can a five-year-old possibly commit suicide? Does a five year old even have the mental capacity to understand how finite death is? I don't think so. A cartoon character almost always snaps back to life for the next episode. A kid is not equipped to understand death. Really, how many adults can honestly say they can imagine a life without themself? Have you ever tried to picture the earth without you being a part of it? I think it may just be impossible to truly have a grasp on the fatality of death. Even adolescents who take suicide as a way out of pain, cannot truly know what they are doing. Death is glamorized by the media. Impressionable youth with yet-to-be-fully-developed frontal lobes (that control reasoning) are exposed to too much, with too little information. But a five to fourteen year old, what do they know of life? So how could they possibly know about death. It befuddles me. It hurts my heart. And I want parents to KNOW that it happens. So I blog today. And I suppose, the blogging is as much to lift this hurt from my heart, as it is to educate the masses. No more ostriches. It's time we raise our heads and face the facts, the cold and brutal statistics of suicide.
November 17th is the 9th Annual Suicide Awareness Day. Save the date. There will be an assortment of venues across the nation designated to awareness. Watch this blog for more details to be announced, coming soon. Together, we will make a difference.
Ahimsa.

SUICIDE 11 Red Flags Is Your Child At Risk?

SUICIDE is the number 3 cause of death for adolescents, claiming more lives than natural causes and accidents combined. KNOW the signs.
1. Depression: Does the youth exhibit sadness or despair lasting for more than short intervals or have deep feelings of futility, of overwhelming self-doubt and/or paralyzing insecurities? Does the youth exhibit a sad demeanor for longer than a few hours or perhaps a day or two at a time? Adolescent hormonal mood swings are different from chronic dangerous depression.
LEARN TO RECOGNIZE THE DIFFERENCE.
2. Art: Whether the art is manufactured by the adolescent or is art the adolescent is drawn to matters little. Artistic expression and attraction are clear, and are serious indicators of the youth’s thoughts and feelings. What is the general, overall expression of the art the youth is creating or smitten with?
3. Music/Media: What do the lyrics express? Does the adolescent gravitate to dark, fatalistic lyrics and/or morbid audio and video content? Yes, lyrics and music, and video games and pals all have an impact on an impressionable youth. Who or what is impressing your adolescent?
4. Obsessions: Look at the whole picture. Is the adolescent obsessed with the way they are being treated by peers, teachers, or persons in positions of authority? Is the adolescent obsessing over a possible crush? Does the youth have an unhealthy focus on guns, violence, death, sex, food, self-image? Is the youth being tormented at school, or on the Internet, or through any number of social settings? Is the youth obsessed with the Internet?
5. Withdrawing: Adolescents will go through a period of separation from their parents; this is a critical part of growing up. However, if the youth is spending each waking and sleeping hour alone, it is time for an intervention. Is the teen withdrawing because they feel helpless to effect a situation? Is the child being bullied? Find out.
6. Lethargy: Does the youth seem to be listless and want to sleep life away? This is a serious sign of depression and must be addressed immediately. SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP. Ask. Listen. Love. What is the underlying cause of the lethargy? Don’t judge. Be the safe place your child knows he can come to. Know what’s going on in your child’s life.
7. Changes in Appearance: Adolescence is a time of developing self-expression and public persona. How adolescents wish to be seen by their peers and society at large is portrayed in rapidly changing outfits and costumes. Adolescents try on different looks, and watch for a reaction to their new look. These changes are normal. However, appearance is a clear determinant of how a teen is feeling inside. Has the look become slovenly or unkempt? Does the outfit reveal an Edgar Allen Poe attitude? Is the attire suddenly solid black? Are gang colors being flashed? What is the message the adolescent is sending? Are you getting it? Does it need to be addressed? It does if the attire and attitude presented is dark, is of a gang nature, or is one that reflects loss of interest in personal hygiene.
8. Changes in Habits: Have sleep habits, everyday rituals such as teeth brushing and bathing (hygiene), or any behaviors that are considered normal to your child changed? Look for signs in day-to-day activities. Sometimes we are so close that we don’t notice what others notice. Take a step back and see what is going on in the life of your child. What appears to be laziness may be a serious sign of depression.
9. Substance Abuse: Self-medicating is a huge red flag that your youth is in danger. Watch for any signs, including cigarette smoking. It is more than just a struggle to ‘fit in’ with the crowd. Substance abuse can be a serious indication that the youth is seeking pain release and relief. Watch closely for the signs. TREAT IMMEDIATELY.
10. Self-Mutilation: Perhaps the most outwardly visible sign that something is wrong, self-mutilation indicates that the youth is needing to feel a physical pain, perhaps to take the focus off the emotional pain he or she is feeling. Add to this the obvious, that is, the clear message of feeling abused, possibly by others. Self-mutilation is a scream for attention. Hear the scream.
11. Eating Disorders: When a person feels as if they have no control over their life, eating is one thing they know they can control. In addition to reflecting a value of self-image, an eating disorder is a sign of inward turmoil, of being out of control. Eating disorders kill. Eating disorders are another way of committing suicide. Get help.

~Ask, Listen, Love♥~

The leading cause of suicide is the overwhelming feeling of having no control over a situation. Adolescence is a natural time of discovery, of finding out who we are in varied settings, of trying on behaviors and relationships and determining what we deem important. It is an important process that all humans go through on the path to adulthood.
With that said, the turbulence of adolescence may be unbearable if not given the tools with which to deal with these rapid life-changing events. If your child is being chided or bullied, is struggling with notions of fitting in, or is otherwise exhibiting signs of detachment, depression, or anger, find out what’s going on. What is important to your child? Find out. Your interest could save their life. Ask, listen, love. And seek professional help immediately if you suspect your child is in danger of either suicide or homicide. The general school of thought is that suicide is homicide turned inward. Think about this until you really understand the implications. If your child is a bully, he or she is at risk for both suicide and for homicidal actions. Alternately, if your child is being bullied, he or she is at risk of both homicidal and suicidal actions. In either case, the risk is real.

Find out more about bullycide* and emos.** Be an informed, vocal member of society; share what you learn about this crisis with others. Suicide is the number three cause of death for adolescents in America. We must stop the madness. Together, we can, and will save lives.***

*Bullycide: When a child commits suicide as the result of either in-person or on-line bullying. Know whom your child is interacting with at every venue. Know who is on-line, and know what goes on on-line.

**Emos: A definition of youth self-described as morbid, suicidal, dark; exhibit depression in dress and demeanor.

***To make a donation or to learn how you can help go to:
http://www.BlessingsInTheMire.com