Suicide Awareness Promotion

I have been dreadful about posting lately. It's not that there was nothing to blog about. On the contrary, there have been several news stories of late that mention "suicide" even if only for a fleeting moment. In fact, each day this week has presented an opportunity to blog with the news stories. Suicides in the Military are finally being acknowledged. This tells me there is a serious problem with suicides in the lives (and deaths) of US troops. When the government comes out with a little dripping of information, there is surely a flood behind the veil. Troops are exposed to horrific circumstances; they are worlds away from loved-ones, and lets face it, lack of a close support base can lead to suicide among even the toughest sorts. So say a little thank you today. Express gratitude for the life you live. No matter how you feel about war, please take a moment to send out a little positive energy beam into the universal flow. Send some love and light. It's good for the soul. It's good for the WHOLE.
On another horrific note, I learned a new statistic this week. My apologies for saying this, but it MUST be shared. "Suicide is the number 5 cause of death in children ages FIVE (5) years old to ages FOURTEEN (14). " WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE? How can a five-year-old possibly commit suicide? Does a five year old even have the mental capacity to understand how finite death is? I don't think so. A cartoon character almost always snaps back to life for the next episode. A kid is not equipped to understand death. Really, how many adults can honestly say they can imagine a life without themself? Have you ever tried to picture the earth without you being a part of it? I think it may just be impossible to truly have a grasp on the fatality of death. Even adolescents who take suicide as a way out of pain, cannot truly know what they are doing. Death is glamorized by the media. Impressionable youth with yet-to-be-fully-developed frontal lobes (that control reasoning) are exposed to too much, with too little information. But a five to fourteen year old, what do they know of life? So how could they possibly know about death. It befuddles me. It hurts my heart. And I want parents to KNOW that it happens. So I blog today. And I suppose, the blogging is as much to lift this hurt from my heart, as it is to educate the masses. No more ostriches. It's time we raise our heads and face the facts, the cold and brutal statistics of suicide.
November 17th is the 9th Annual Suicide Awareness Day. Save the date. There will be an assortment of venues across the nation designated to awareness. Watch this blog for more details to be announced, coming soon. Together, we will make a difference.
Ahimsa.

SUICIDE 11 Red Flags Is Your Child At Risk?

SUICIDE is the number 3 cause of death for adolescents, claiming more lives than natural causes and accidents combined. KNOW the signs.
1. Depression: Does the youth exhibit sadness or despair lasting for more than short intervals or have deep feelings of futility, of overwhelming self-doubt and/or paralyzing insecurities? Does the youth exhibit a sad demeanor for longer than a few hours or perhaps a day or two at a time? Adolescent hormonal mood swings are different from chronic dangerous depression.
LEARN TO RECOGNIZE THE DIFFERENCE.
2. Art: Whether the art is manufactured by the adolescent or is art the adolescent is drawn to matters little. Artistic expression and attraction are clear, and are serious indicators of the youth’s thoughts and feelings. What is the general, overall expression of the art the youth is creating or smitten with?
3. Music/Media: What do the lyrics express? Does the adolescent gravitate to dark, fatalistic lyrics and/or morbid audio and video content? Yes, lyrics and music, and video games and pals all have an impact on an impressionable youth. Who or what is impressing your adolescent?
4. Obsessions: Look at the whole picture. Is the adolescent obsessed with the way they are being treated by peers, teachers, or persons in positions of authority? Is the adolescent obsessing over a possible crush? Does the youth have an unhealthy focus on guns, violence, death, sex, food, self-image? Is the youth being tormented at school, or on the Internet, or through any number of social settings? Is the youth obsessed with the Internet?
5. Withdrawing: Adolescents will go through a period of separation from their parents; this is a critical part of growing up. However, if the youth is spending each waking and sleeping hour alone, it is time for an intervention. Is the teen withdrawing because they feel helpless to effect a situation? Is the child being bullied? Find out.
6. Lethargy: Does the youth seem to be listless and want to sleep life away? This is a serious sign of depression and must be addressed immediately. SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP. Ask. Listen. Love. What is the underlying cause of the lethargy? Don’t judge. Be the safe place your child knows he can come to. Know what’s going on in your child’s life.
7. Changes in Appearance: Adolescence is a time of developing self-expression and public persona. How adolescents wish to be seen by their peers and society at large is portrayed in rapidly changing outfits and costumes. Adolescents try on different looks, and watch for a reaction to their new look. These changes are normal. However, appearance is a clear determinant of how a teen is feeling inside. Has the look become slovenly or unkempt? Does the outfit reveal an Edgar Allen Poe attitude? Is the attire suddenly solid black? Are gang colors being flashed? What is the message the adolescent is sending? Are you getting it? Does it need to be addressed? It does if the attire and attitude presented is dark, is of a gang nature, or is one that reflects loss of interest in personal hygiene.
8. Changes in Habits: Have sleep habits, everyday rituals such as teeth brushing and bathing (hygiene), or any behaviors that are considered normal to your child changed? Look for signs in day-to-day activities. Sometimes we are so close that we don’t notice what others notice. Take a step back and see what is going on in the life of your child. What appears to be laziness may be a serious sign of depression.
9. Substance Abuse: Self-medicating is a huge red flag that your youth is in danger. Watch for any signs, including cigarette smoking. It is more than just a struggle to ‘fit in’ with the crowd. Substance abuse can be a serious indication that the youth is seeking pain release and relief. Watch closely for the signs. TREAT IMMEDIATELY.
10. Self-Mutilation: Perhaps the most outwardly visible sign that something is wrong, self-mutilation indicates that the youth is needing to feel a physical pain, perhaps to take the focus off the emotional pain he or she is feeling. Add to this the obvious, that is, the clear message of feeling abused, possibly by others. Self-mutilation is a scream for attention. Hear the scream.
11. Eating Disorders: When a person feels as if they have no control over their life, eating is one thing they know they can control. In addition to reflecting a value of self-image, an eating disorder is a sign of inward turmoil, of being out of control. Eating disorders kill. Eating disorders are another way of committing suicide. Get help.

~Ask, Listen, Love♥~

The leading cause of suicide is the overwhelming feeling of having no control over a situation. Adolescence is a natural time of discovery, of finding out who we are in varied settings, of trying on behaviors and relationships and determining what we deem important. It is an important process that all humans go through on the path to adulthood.
With that said, the turbulence of adolescence may be unbearable if not given the tools with which to deal with these rapid life-changing events. If your child is being chided or bullied, is struggling with notions of fitting in, or is otherwise exhibiting signs of detachment, depression, or anger, find out what’s going on. What is important to your child? Find out. Your interest could save their life. Ask, listen, love. And seek professional help immediately if you suspect your child is in danger of either suicide or homicide. The general school of thought is that suicide is homicide turned inward. Think about this until you really understand the implications. If your child is a bully, he or she is at risk for both suicide and for homicidal actions. Alternately, if your child is being bullied, he or she is at risk of both homicidal and suicidal actions. In either case, the risk is real.

Find out more about bullycide* and emos.** Be an informed, vocal member of society; share what you learn about this crisis with others. Suicide is the number three cause of death for adolescents in America. We must stop the madness. Together, we can, and will save lives.***

*Bullycide: When a child commits suicide as the result of either in-person or on-line bullying. Know whom your child is interacting with at every venue. Know who is on-line, and know what goes on on-line.

**Emos: A definition of youth self-described as morbid, suicidal, dark; exhibit depression in dress and demeanor.

***To make a donation or to learn how you can help go to:
http://www.BlessingsInTheMire.com

Can Yogurt KILL?

October is breast cancer awareness month. In support of the cause, between September 25th and October 31, for every person that can correctly identify where on http://www.BlessingsInTheMire.com they have found the "missing link" the website owners will donate one Yoplait® yogurt pink lid to help in the fight to find a cure for breast cancer.

My question is this: If we end up eating, say, a million of those little yogurts, will we die of yogurt over-dose (Yogur-dose? )?Come and join in on the fun! Together we can make a difference!And good luck finding the missing link on: http://www.BlessingsInTheMire.com

While you’re there on the home page of www.BlessingsInTheMire.com click on the pink ribbon campaign. It will take you to the breast cancer awareness page where you can make a free click to help pay for mamograms, or make a donation.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT!

9-11 Doesn't Feel Like a HOLIDAY

Blessings in the Mire was written as I searched for meaning, tried to make sense of many painful episodes throughout my life. As a proprietor of a metaphysical store, I have heard numerous stories of miracles, survival, finding the "silver lining" to the events. Finding a "blessing" in the mire of 9-11, however, is not something I have as of yet been able to do. Is there a positive that can come from the shock, horror, pain, mourning of such evil? The dust has settled, the wake of destruction has been cleared, leaving mourning and remembrance, leaving love.
It is a calm settling that has come over me today as I remember, as I look out at San Diego, clear, blue skies, and know that the skies weep in Manhatten. Tears falling over New York seems more appropriate than brilliant sun shining, and the laughter and shrieks of tiny tots at the pre-school yards away from my balcony in downtown San Diego. My own grand daughters are at home today, a result of the threat of terrorist attacks against our schools. What is the option? Home-schooling or moving to a distant town or even to another country where Americans are less hated comes to mind. But then, where are Americans not considered arrogant, or spoiled, materialistic, crude, or distrusted? Does such a place on earth exist? And why are Americans so disliked? Have we done something to be deserving of the world's hatred? As I note the media frenzy to the likes of Britney and Paris and Lindsey, etc., I begin to understand, a bit, of what the others see. From a surface level it does appear that Americans are shallow, materialistic, self-absorbed, and uncaring. But dig beneath the surface and look more closely at the heros and heroines that trade their lives for the higher cause. Look first at the obvious, the firefighters, the peace officers, the teachers that really care about the students. Look past the ridiculousness of what a celebrity is wearing, and find the person that uses that celebrity status to make positive change on this planet. Look at the retired cop that now works as a crossing guard ensuring the safety of the kids as they travel through their day. Look for the artists' strokes that bring attention to the cause. See through the lense of the photographer as he causes you to focus on the nefarious. Find the hero in your self as you go through life. Make a difference each and every day, and when something tragic happens, seek always, the "Blessings in the Mire." That's the only sense I can make of this; it's a call to focus on what really matters. Tragedy is love manifesting. Love is the energy that remains when the wake is over. Simplistically, love is the answer.

Suicide, New Orleans, Oprah

Wednesday, August 29, 2007, Oprah will cover the issue of suicide, specifically, increased rates of suicide following the horrific Katrina event that still plagues all of us. It makes me happy that Oprah is filling this void, going where others would likely shudder and turn away from. It has long been my focus, this dark and taboo subject of "suicide". It has been the "theme" around which my live revolves ever since July 1995 when my own son took his life. "Took his life" sounds homogenized, not nearly as brutal as the truth. Even "suicide" is not harsh enough for the reality. The word suicide implies a brutal act, but leaves out the cause, the emotion of sadness, the space for grief. People generally do not choose death because they expect death to be a charming alternative to life. People choose death as an escape 'from' not as an entry 'into'. Suicide is the last resort, the final act. It is the back against the wall. It is the absence of support. It grows, a weed of interpreted inescape from the grips of pain. I know this. This is my truth. And I only hope that Oprah's spotlighting of the increase in suicides in New Orleans will also turn to highlight the absolutely inexcusable way this government has responded to the needs of her constituents. I'll be watching Oprah; do us proud.
On another note, the Blessings in the Mire website has now connected with Amazon.com and a portion of the proceeds from all sales that come through http://www.BlessingsInTheMire.com will go to help PREVENT SUICIDES. That means that anytime you want to make a purchase on Amazon, if you will go to http://www.BlessingsInTheMire.com and click on the "PRODUCTS" tab on the navigation bar, then click onto any one of the many products listed you will be taken to Amazon.com. No matter what you purchase from Amazon, we will receive a percentage which means that every single time you shop on Amazon, when you go through http://BlessingsInTheMire.com you will be helping prevent suicides. We think it is a noble cause. And Amazon has an incredible selection of almost anything one could ever want! Did you know that Amazon is now even selling food?? Check out our 'celestial selections' of gourmet foods through http://www.BlessingsInTheMire.com. And please send all of your friends there too! You could be helping to save a life. Not bad for a day's work...or shopping!
At any rate, please set your DVR to record Oprah on Wednesday. Maybe we can all learn to see the problem of suicide before it happens to affect us on a very personal level.
Much love and light.
Jan Deelstra, author Blessings in the Mire